Here are five ways to help prevent money from ruining your relationship:

1.   Always remember what attracted you to one another and why you wed. Your relationship is about much more than money. Although it’s bound to happen, you simply need to know how to deal with it.  First and foremost, remove such thoughts as, “we are just a bad match” out of your head.  Once you do that, it will be easier to discuss this issue.

2.    Understand history. The perception you have on finances and how you deal with them usually stems back to your parents and what you were taught by them.  Share this with each other.  It will give you a much better understanding of where your partner is coming from and the reason for their money habits. You still may not agree, but it will make you less angry allowing you to be more considerate to one another.

3.    Defuse a fight and give a little credit. The worst time to have the “money talk” is when you are angry. Take a moment to cool down and then, using a friendly tone, express your feeling and concerns.  Begin with a positive.  You could say, “I admire the way you can make such a purchase without overanalyzing it.”  Thus, leaving your spouse open to respond with something like, “Your attention and diligence in managing our bank accounts is what makes you a wonderful partner.”  Stay on the topic at hand and be empathetic.  Feeling understood makes it much easier to fabricate a solution.

4.    Spending plan vs. budget. To many, the word “budget” carries a harsh meaning.  It may leave you with strict rules and be hard to stick by. Try replacing it with a “spending plan”. By having a good plan in place keeps you more on track.  You both will have the understanding of your income and your expenses, reminding you that you are partners working toward the same goals that you previously set together.

5.    Divide up your cash by giving each other an allowance. Use your joint account where you each contribute an equal percentage of their paycheck to pay all the bills.  Use separate accounts for your weekly allowances.  This money is for you each to choose how and where to spend it.  It will allow you assure the bills are being paid and at the same time, not having to be accountable to each other for every dollar you spend.

Chances are good that there is at least something for each of you to admire about the other’s spending and money habits.  Find out what it is, compliment it and create a good financial balance between you.  Ultimately it will result in fewer money arguments, a more successful relationship, and better financial practices within your relationship.

Five Ways to Argue Less About Money was created by and is property of American Consumer News.

The financial concerns of many marriages are often the building blocks to a divorce. More couples argue over money matters than almost any other issue. It can get out of control and often both parties are left jaded and bitter, with no hope of full reconciliation. But as desperate as people become to get out of a bad marriage, many couples literally can not afford to divorce.

There are many financial factors involved in divorce. First and foremost, there is the legal aspect of the situation. Legal fees, time off from work for court, and other fees associated with the legalities of divorce can be seemingly insurmountable depending on the individual situation. Couples who are not exactly willing to work out their differences in a suitable manner may be in for a long and expensive fight. Many people can not afford the fight and continue to live in a loveless marriage, which can be very physically and emotionally draining.

Secondly, the expenses of establishing two separate households can keep many couples together, especially when children are involved. Buying or renting a new house, moving expenses, setting up utilities can all be costly adventures many couples can not afford to take on. Couples who have a lot of debts can not always find a way to pay all the bills and still be able to survive on their own. It can seem overwhelming to think of changing every aspect of your daily life so many will choose to not make that change, despite the difficulties they face living together.

Third, the act of finding affordable insurance for your whole family is hard to do, even through an employer but if you have to go about it on your own, it can be very expensive and a daunting experience.

There are so many considerations to make when it comes to the issue of divorces that many people would rather suffer in silence than make a break. But you do have other options that do not involve the traditional motions of divorce.

Here is an overview of what else you can do legally to bypass the expensive legal fees of divorce:

• File for a legal separation and split property, assets and debts without going through an actual divorce.

• Choose to take custody and financial support issues on your own to family court. You can deal with family court without having a lawyer present and it will help to resolve the serious family issues that are at stake.

• If you are reading this and haven’t yet married, work out a prenuptial agreement that outlines all your financial information, including debts, should the future hold  a divorce.

Is It Worth It to Get Divorced? was created by and is property of American Consumer News.

There are many things couples can do to prevent this scenario. Here are some tips to mull over about marriage and money.

1. Communication is Essential

If you are not talking collectively about money, chances are good that one half of the couple will overspend. Without setting limits that both parties are aware of and not having a budget, couples can easily get overwhelmed with debt, late payments, and overall money mismanagement. Set a time each week to discuss income, bills, savings plans – whatever financial issues might be in need of analysis. Balance the checkbook and pay the bills together so both parties are fully aware of where they stand.

2. Find Common Ground

For many couples, there may be a situation where one is a spender and the other is a saver. Without the proper communication, a couple’s financial goals are a moot point. Find common ground and make priorities for your financial direction. Discuss what is most important – saving for college, buying a home, establishing an emergency fund. Whatever financial goals you have, write them down and review them often. Having a common goal to work towards can and will often strengthen the relationship you already have.

3. Make Important Banking Decisions

Once married, many couples immediately dissolve their separate accounts and combine all of the money into a joint account. It may not always be the best avenue to travel. In sticking with a budget, couples should feel good about having a sense of financial independence. Just because you each have a separate bank account as well as a joint account, does not mean that as a couple you lack trust. It may lessen the burden to have your “own money” to spend as you see fit, provided a budget and goals have been set.

4. Have a Plan for the Golden Years

Looking forward to the future with your beloved, it is wise to establish a plan for retirement early in life. It gives you both the opportunity to save up more for a longer period of time. A good rule of thumb is to put away 10% of your income into an emergency fund. Once you have built up a good bulk of money, plan to invest it into a retirement account and keep saving. Even if you are living paycheck to paycheck, you can likely find a something to sacrifice to save that 10%. Consider it a big investment into your future golden years together and have fun planning for those days to come.

5. Work Together

In many cases only one half of the couple will come into the marriage with financial baggage. If you are willing to make the commitment to each other “for richer or poorer”, you better be willing to mean it. Debt needs to be handled by both parties. This is important for your emotional well-being as a couple but also because the debt of your partner, if not handled correctly, can carry over to your own credit score and affect you negatively.

6. Live A Life Without Secrets

Financial secrets can be devastating to a marriage. If you or your partner go out and make a large purchase or hide any past debts, it is likely the trust factor will be broken, leaving your relationship in the dust. When you marry, you make a commitment that is meant to last a lifetime. Hiding information, no matter how embarrassing it may be, can cost you a lot more than money. It will likely cost you your marriage. Be open and upfront when it comes to finances or you will find yourself very single and very much in debt.

Talking Marriage and Money was created by and is property of American Consumer News.

Buying an engagement ring is one of the major high points in a person’s life. It is emotional and exciting and can quickly get out of hand. The salesperson may tend to be a bit pushy or the recipient may have high expectations. Whatever the reason, many guys – and eventually married couples – will suffer from spending more than is reasonably affordable on the all-important diamond engagement ring.

Two Months Salary???

The misconception that you must spend two months worth of your hard-earned salary on the ring was a notion likely started by the owners of the diamond mines. There is no required pricing guide for engagement rings and the only true factor that needs considering is How Much Can You Afford to Spend. Diamond engagement rings are meant to be a token of your love but let’s face it – we can not put a monetary value on love. You can however put a price on the amount of monthly payments, late fees, and other penalties when you overspend on a ring, especially if that ring is on credit.

Here are some tips on the diamond engagement scenario so you can get what you want without getting taken for a ride.

Shield Thyself

Before stepping foot into a store, browse through the online version of your jeweler and see what you like and the going rates. If you find a few that you fancy, take the time to understand the pricing. From there, figure out an amount you can afford based on a straight cash payment or a payment plan. When you finally get face to face with the high-pressure sales force, you may be less likely to be guilted in to a less-affordable option.

Keep Expectations Realistic

If you have browsed the online store, you will likely have some idea of what it will cost for a ring you like. The pricing of diamonds will depend on the cut of the stone, the clarity of the stone, the size of the stone, and the color of the stone. You can do additional research online about the “Four C’s” to get the going rates in pricing. Consider the cost of the different ring and diamond styles that are within your budget. Be realistic about what you can afford and consider other important things you can do with the extra cash instead of going for the flashier ring.

Keep Your Options Open

While many couples still believe in full tradition when it comes to their engagement and wedding, many others have become more relaxed and would rather set their own traditions, making practicality a priority.

If you and your intended are not above a more frugal way of getting a ring, here are some other options you may want to consider:

•  Use a family heirloom. Perhaps your mom or your grandmother has a ring that can be passed on to the next generation. The cost of resizing a ring is drastically less-expensive than purchasing a brand new one.
•  Visit antique shops or pawn shops for rings. It may seem a bit out of the ordinary but one never knows what kind of treasures will be found in unexpected places.
•  Forget the diamond and choose another kind of stone. Maybe your bride-to-be has a favorite color or favorite stone other than a diamond. There is no rule that says an engagement ring has to be a diamond. Think outside of the box and save a lot of money that can be put to better use, say for a down payment on your first home.

Diamonds Are Forever – Well, So Is Debt was created by and is property of American Consumer News.